patricia evans book the verbally abusive relationship

Just by reading the whether or not he will change log I felt that if I presented the Agreement, especially since I had already left, that it would make things worse. If he is a discounter he will probably write the whole thing off out of hand. I also fear for the way she says to present as even if there was never any physical harm, verbal anger is hard enough and it may unleash quite a bit when the abuser is presented with the Agreement rather than making him see what he has done by any means. However, this book is more geared towards people who want to make it work and if you are already out of the relationship it is a lot harder to see how it would apply or help you aside from what the author calls “letting him know why you left.” I believe that if you have already left, the abuser probably doesn't care why as they are too angry at you for leaving. I find this book helpful for identifying if someone is willing to change. It follows with choosing to stay or go in the relationship.

After this is done it explains what men seeking change can do (this book focuses on the male being the abuser), whether or not the abuser is following the change, and what to do if he won't agree to cooperate with the Agreement. Finally, the main focus of the book “The Agreement” is brought forth and the author shares how to prepare it and present it, and finally how to write the agreement. Next the author moves on to the partner's wanting a change and what would motivate an abuser to change. This area also goes into the different types of verbal abuse, whether or not counseling is helpful, and if a change is even possible for the abuser. Once he does this, it is harder for him to see the real person past his dream women, and when something is out of line with what he thinks it should be, he gets angry because she is not mirroring his dream woman. In this case, the dream woman is someone he's concocted as an extension of himself and “placed” in his partner's self as a way of seeing her as perfect. The main first part of this book deals with the portrayal of the verbally abusive man and his dream woman.

This is probably something only useful for those in an intimate relationship. This book, instead of focusing on the relationship, instead focuses on the abuser and whether or not he can change, and to a smaller extent, whether or not a woman should stay or go. In fact, I would recommend reading that one first as she touches on some points from it in this book.

The Verbally Abusive Man is kind of a follow up to the author, Patricia Evans, previous book The Verbally Abusive Relationship.

Patricia evans book the verbally abusive relationship